Today was another really long day. I slept in because I didn’t have tutorial which was nice. I got up at 10:30 and got ready for POL S section. It was really short (like 10 minutes) then we all left. I walked home with a guy from my section, he was pretty cool. Maybe we’ll be able to rush him because he seemed interested in fraternities in general. I’ll try to get him to come out. After the short class I had a two hour break before my makeup lab.

During the break I went to addictingames.com and found http://www.xgenstudios.com/play/castle/ which kept me (and several other KA’s) busy for a while. Before class, Jim, Schmeller and I went to Davinci’s for subs and then sureshot for some coffee befoer my lab. The coffee was nice to keep me warm in the rain on the way to my physics lab.

When I walked into the lab I didn’t see anyone else doing the same one I was so I grabbed a table by myself and started. The girls next to me asked if I wanted to join their group so I obliged. One was named Amanda and one was named Moriko. They were both really nice and fairly attractive. We managed to get the lab done in a reasonable amount of time which let me get home to set up the bookshelf that tyler had called and told me arrived at the house.

When I got home I started to setup the bookshelf. I set it partly up before the rush committee meeting and finished after. I did kind of a shitty job :/ I put the backing on backwards and it wasn’t lined up perfectly so I missed a few nails and damaged the bottom shelf a little (you can’t tell w/ books on it though). Another problem is that it is tall and it isn’t secured to the wall so I’m using cans of tuna to make it lean back so it doesn’t tip onto me :). It doesn’t look too bad in the end though.

For the rush committee meeting Matt, Ben, Jim and I went to DaVinci’s and came up with dates for inductions, initiations and several rush events. I went pretty well and we finished pretty quickely. We stayed past closing but Joe didn’t care (even though he made a joke at closing and told us to leave). I was happy that we got the calendar taken care of because I’m pretty busy for the most part. It is nice being able to enlist the support of the other people on the committee. By the way, yes, that is DaVinci’s twice in one day; what can I say :)?

After the meeting I went to Bens to play a little Halo 2 with him and Jack. I think Ben envisioned more people being there because Jack showed up w/ chips and dip. I stayed until 9:30 when I got a call from Tyler to come to the Inn. I showed up at the inn about 5 minutes late and walked in and sat by myself because I didn’t see Fizz or Tyler.

At the inn tonight there was a special speaker named Dave who was really cool he talked about being being still and had us sit for 60 seconds just being still. As I was sitting there I had a moment of enlightment; God isn’t all about a huge ominous being above us, he is in everyone around me. I kept thinking that an envisioning an orb of light emitting from the people around me’s hearts that I could “see” with my eyes closed. It was a really good experience for me and it will make me think more about the people I interact with.

After the inn I came home and boxed u all my laundry and got my clothes ready and what not for going home. I also put up the bookshelf and cleaned up my room a little. It isn’t very good still but atleast it won’t look like a pig sty when I come back fromt thanksgiving break.

I’m going home tomorrow for thanks giving, I’m excited to see my family! I have a big huge laundry thing full of dirty clothes to do when I get home and I have my stuff packed. Kaysie is coming to pick me up at 10:00 tomorrow. I hope she’s on time so we don’t hit any traffic in vancouver or anything; it shouldn’t be an issue.

I guess we’re having thanksgiving with my aunt pam and uncle ron at our house… And we’re not having turkey which is weird. Instead we’re having ribs or something crazy like that. I’m sure it’ll be great. I can’t wait.

Well the weekend came and now its gone. I had a good weekend for the most part. Friday night I went roller skating. Corey Fredericks was there with his girlfriend Jill and Tyler, Shea and Pez came with me. I had a great time, its been forever since I’d roller skated.

Saturday was the apple cup. The huskies lost but it was fun. We got pizza and had a projector in the living room. There was one really sweet special teams play, a fake punt (or was it field goal? I think punt). It might have been just a bad snap but the huskies converted it to a first down on a quick pass.

Today I slept in until like 2:30 in the afternoon which was nice. I woke up and didn’t really do anything for a while. I watched the last half of the Seahawks game, The Seahawks (unlike the huskies) won it w/ a kickass interception in the 4th quarter. After the game I went to sureshot to work on some math. Gabe and Ashly S. were there on a date (how precous). Schmeller was there so I sat with him and worked for a while. Schmeller left and Gabe and Ashly left so I packed up and went home in time for The Simpsons (on the projector) and then exec. Exec was quick, all we did was decide to cancel chapter.

Today was Nic’s birthday so I called and left a message. I was happy that he called me back, we talked about Halo 2 and general bullshit and then he hung up and I went back inside to shoot the shit with the guys in the living room.

After this I went to Aladin’s w/ Schmeller to get a Gyro at midnight and it was f’ing good (nice n’ spicy). We went to safeway after aladin’s and on the way back we saw some drunk guys “fighting” in the street by the Wilsonian on 47th. One guy wrapped his friend around a parking meter and pulled on his legs smashing his balls into it. Dave and I got a laugh out of it.

When I got home, Jim got home shortly afterwards. When he did we talked about how we were switching to a new host (ditching colocation and getting a dedicated server) We should have that all set up in 48 hrs.

Finally after all this I finished my math note sheet and now at almost 3 in the morning I’m ready to go to bed (even though I’m not really tired from the late sleeping in). So after a 10 minute journal entry I’m gonna call it a night.

Today I realized that I need to start keeping a journal. Things don’t last forever, I learned that the hard way today. I’ve never been a fan of live journals, actually I despise them, so I’m not treating this as a live journal. If other people want to read it, thats fine but that isn’t what it is for. This is for me. It is for me to remember the things that happen to me. I don’t plan on using it as a way to get attention or to rag on about how badly life sucks like most lj users do but instead I want a log of the important things that happen to me in my life. An important mentor to me in my life, Tim Kelsey, tried to make it clear to me that I should be doing this but I didn’t really understand. Now I understand, and here is why:

Today was for the most part a good day, I was up all night last night finishing an essay (typical) and went to class and turned it in. I got free lunch (pizza) because of a meeting with HP people on campus which was cool. The rest of fizzes computer stuff came in so Nolan and I (and gabe and fizz) built his computer which is cool. I went to A Phi’s to play ping pong dressed up as a girl (they told us 10 minutes before the event we needed to dress up). Seth and I lost horribly, oh well it was fun. After that I went to the Inn, it was good, Ryan Church talked about society’s downfalls and how we don’t have to succomb to them. I really liked the worship (I always do). I was really tired from staying up all night the night before so I had plans to goto bed early but on the way home from the inn I noticed I had a message from my mom so as I was parting with Fizz (he was going home) I listenened to it.

It was one of those “Call me back” messages that you can safely assume means she has some sort of bad news. In this case it was far worse than I had imagined. When she answered, she said (as I was expecting), “I have some bad news.” At this point all sort of things flashed through my mind but the thing that stuck was that my cat, Smokey must have died (he’s like 15 years old). Instead she said, “Charlene’s husband Mark committed suicide this morning.” I was completely shocked. What could I say? What should I say? I didn’t know, and my mom could tell I didn’t know what to say, so she just kept talking, explaining further the situation. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes as I walked onto the KA property. Mark has been a pretty inspirational guy to me over the last few months. While not always positive influence, he was a really cool, down-to-earth, guy. I thought of him as a role-model of sorts, a guy who knows what he likes and is fun to be around. He always had funny anecdotal stories from college and tidbits of advice ranging from how to smoke a cigar to how to make money and be successful. All of this flashed into my head, all the times I remember with him over the summer.–He was my mom’s best friend’s husband, I saw him a lot, I knew him well. All of my ties; he gave to me. He gave me some cuban cigars (which btw, cigars aren’t very good) that I smoked on the fourth of july. He was a very generous and giving guy. He gave my brother and I like $100 worth of fireworks to blow up on the 4th. Its so incredibly sad to think that he’s dead now; it’s indescribable.–I started to cry, my mom would ask me a question but I couldn’t think of words to answer. I just sniffled and she knew I was crying. (I’m almost crying again now). By the time I was done talking to her (about 10 minutes) I was in full tears. I wanted to talk to someone.

Jason; he’s the man I need. Jason is my bro’, the first guy I thought of when I thought “I need to talk to someone”. I went down to my room, passing jim and pez who both seemed busy on the way to get some tissues. Next I went upstairs, Jason wasn’t in his room but I heard his voice down the hall, I was relieved to see he was in Nolan’s room. I walked in and immediatly started to cry again. They both listened to me as I explained what happened. Just being with them, people who I know care about me, made me feel better. They reminded me to think of the happy things about Mark and it cheared me up. I’m so glad I have Bro’s like this to count on. Thanks guys, even if you never read this, I really appreciate it.

I guess all I can do now is pray for Mark’s family (he left behind his wife and two stepchildren) and for everyone that he knew. He definitely left a legacy with me. He is someone that I will never forget even though we didn’t really know eachother for a large portion of my life. Thanks for everything Mark, I know you’re up there somewhere reading this and I want you to know I really appreciate you and even though its sad that you had to go, I want you to know you are loved.

I tribute this entry to Mark Roadman, a great man who has inspired me.